Unsettled settlement

Inspired by the thought of confessional poets who were also fascinated with death during their life time. Everything cease to decline and decay even my emotion and feelings. Someday my wishes to settle will fade away. Till my hair turns to grey I feel this way,

I don't even exist

I know it is already declared

I am no way in between real people

What I'm holding is fake me

I am actually discouraged by fact

What fascinates me is just lie

So, these days I'm leading life which doesn't even exist

I know fact has given me nothing

Lies are taking somewhere, I can't return back from there

Hurting myself and trying to see

How far one can go being hurt always

What is called maximum limit?

What point will be a peak?

From where I shall get back again in real life with real me

Sometime I feel I am alone

But I know I am not

Even when I am in solitude I am not alone

and even single

Now I am covered with lies and facts too

Whatee... company! I must say

But these days I am having company with fake me

And fake me is giving so many thing

Fake me helped me to understand the fact that I don't even exist

All my vision is blurring the truth

And again I accept it and its my fact

Now I am fascinated with all the lies

You have got nothing to be fascinated over but your fake ways and lies are something

I can't resist

So here I begin the game

Made promise too myself that I will be a proper player

I will not hurt anyone but will accept the lies as ultimate fact

I will not disturb anyone and will be available no matter when I am asked for

It's not something like I am sacrificing 

All I am doing is acting like I don't exist